Parenting through the teen years is challenging enough but when you add shared custody into the mix, the complexities can multiply. As children grow older, their needs, preferences, and schedules evolve, which can create tension or confusion in existing custody arrangements. Whether you're already navigating shared custody with a teenager or preparing for what’s ahead, understanding the common challenges and how to approach them can help reduce conflict and support your child’s growth.

Why Teenagers Change the Custody Dynamic

Teenagers are seeking independence, developing strong opinions, and dealing with academic, social, and extracurricular pressures. All of these factors can make custody transitions more difficult, even in the most cooperative co-parenting relationships.

Common Changes That Impact Custody:

More intense school demands (homework, sports, exams)
Part-time jobs or driving responsibilities
Expanding social lives and desire for autonomy
Strong preferences about where they live or spend their time

While these shifts are a natural part of growing up, they often create friction between parents trying to stick to a court-ordered custody agreement.

Common Challenges of Shared Custody with Teens

1. Resistance to Transitions

Teens may become vocal about not wanting to switch homes regularly, especially if it interferes with their routine or social life.

2. Differing Household Rules

One home may be stricter or more lenient, creating frustration or power struggles both for the teen and the parents.

3. Communication Breakdowns

Teenagers often keep their emotions to themselves. If a conflict arises, they might not tell either parent, leading to misunderstandings.

4. Parental Conflict

Teens are observant and may pick up on co-parenting tension, which can impact their emotional well-being and may even lead them to manipulate the situation to avoid one parent.

Legal Considerations in Michigan

In Michigan, the court’s primary concern is always the best interests of the child, regardless of age. However, courts may give more weight to a teenager’s preferences especially if the teen is mature and can clearly articulate their reasoning.

Still, it’s important to note that a teen doesn’t get to decide outright. Any official change to the custody order must go through the court system, and it must be shown that a modification is in the child's best interests and/or there has been a significant change in circumstances.

Solutions for Navigating Shared Custody with Teens

1. Be Flexible with the Parenting Plan

Strict, rigid custody schedules may not work well with a teen's changing needs. Consider revisiting the parenting plan to allow for more flexibility with the teen’s input in mind.

2. Communicate as Co-Parents

Keep each other informed about school, social events, and emotional changes. A united front minimizes confusion and reduces opportunities for conflict.

3. Involve the Teen in the Process

Let your teen feel heard. Including them in conversations (when appropriate) helps build trust and encourages responsibility.

4. Seek Professional Guidance

Family counseling or co-parenting classes can be helpful when navigating high-conflict situations. Legal support may also be needed to revisit or modify custody agreements.

What You Can Expect

Child-Focused Strategies: We prioritize what’s best for your teenager not just what’s legally convenient.
Experienced Legal Guidance: Our team knows how to navigate complex post-judgment custody issues.
Help with Modifications: If the current plan no longer works, we’ll help you file for a legally sound modification.
Support with Communication Tools: We can recommend resources for better co-parenting communication.

Moving Forward Together

The teen years are full of change but they don’t have to mean chaos for your custody arrangement. With the right legal support, flexible planning, and open communication, your family can successfully navigate this phase while continuing to provide a stable, supportive environment.

Contact Harris & Literski today to learn how we can help you adapt your shared custody plan to meet your teenager’s evolving needs.

Shared Custody During the Teen Years: Unique Challenges and Solutions